Month: January 2021

Hello Friends!

Here I am, once again! I’m determined to make my writing a habit this year, even if I’m a little less certain that I have anything worthwhile to say. Heartfelt thanks for “tuning in” – just imagining a friend reading this makes it seem worthwhile.

“That even as we hurt, we hoped.”

“That even as we tired, we tried.”

Yep, I’m kind of obsessed with The Hill We Climb by the extraordinary Amanda Gorman. While I’ve missed a couple days of listening, I’ve tried to do so regularly. It’s a wonderful, uplifting “brain break” from the nonstop torrent words that fill my day via email and zoom (each of which fill my cup in their own way). Just to hear her cadence, her vocabulary, and to feel her vision for a brighter tomorrow… it lifts me up.

Writing the whole poem out in my journal is something I’m glad I took the time to do. I’ve always found that I process information better while speaking or writing – it wasn’t until I arrived at Oldfields that I learned some of the terms for each of our unique learning styles, and in so doing, became more aware of my own. In college and then later, in graduate school, I learned that I needed to be taking notes to really “absorb” the information presented by the professor. I took alot of notes (more like transcription), which made me pretty handy for my friends who were not similarly inclined, but I rarely found that I used them much once I’d taken them. The process of writing in itself is what enabled me to internalize the information. And, at 50+ years old, I continue to be who I am… and moreso. Since writing the poem out, different phrases from sunk in, and several seem to bubble up more often than others. “That even as we grieved, we grew.” This one most of all.

There is just so much grief in our world right now. While I’ve known this for months, while I’ve watched in horror as the numbers have climbed, supported friends through their losses, been moved by the flags planted in memorial in DC, and I’ve tried to feel it. In doing so, I think I’ve also learned that one can not feel grief, truly, until you have someone to grieve. And now, so many of us, do. It’s an experience that humbles us and unites us – always, in the past, and now more than ever (in my lifetime).

And so this phrase “as we grieved, we grew” is really stuck in my mind. It calls to me because I want to find the good out of the terrible, the lessons learned from this difficult and sad time, the call to action from all this pain. So, how do we do that?

When I think of the three lives lost from my life last month, representing the 100’s of thousands lost in the US alone over these long difficult months, I want to honor them by growing. It’s a course of action and an antidote to feeling “stuck” when all else seems so futile. I can’t comfort the families whose loved ones are gone, I can’t heal the wounded hearts and I can’t even fly to be with those I love to show them how much I care. I can’t do many things… but I can try to grow. It’s something!

And this brings me back to my admittedly self-centered plan for the blog this year. Or maybe it’s just another example of masterful rationalization, to make my focus on my “greatest impact” seem less selfish amidst such sorrowful times. I recognize that my ability to dedicate time, effort, thoughts and words to my achieving my personal “best” in 2021, is the ultimate luxury. It is the gift my friends can no longer enjoy. So I’m choosing to take each of their lives and their legacies as my inspiration. I’m going to stick to my knitting, my intentions and my goals and see what I can do with the time I’m given. There’s simply no time to waste.

Wishing you each a hopeful, healthy week ahead.

THIS WEEK’S RECOMMENDED RESOURCE IS:

1. CliftonStrengths 34 – Grateful to my friend and inspiration (and birthday girl this past week), Shari Goodwin of Jaeger2, for recommending this tool to me. I’ve always believed in the importance of leaning into the things we love, and leveraging the things we enjoy – because we’ll likely practice them and be better at them. This really fun, reasonably priced and time-efficient self-assessment resource has given me much to think about over the past year. I highly recommend doing it & keeping the report “handy” especially while choosing where and how to invest the gift we’re given with each precious day.

CELEBRATING PROGRESS TOWARDS MY GOALS:

1. Within my goal of maintaining a disciplined & balanced approach to the allocation of my energy – a couple of milestones to celebrate.
   • I am happy to say I’ve managed to securely plant reading & rowing in the routine in January. (Finished Beautiful Ruins by Jess Walter today).
   • I also have two good examples of finding ways to not undertake, directly, a couple of tempting new volunteer projects. Instead, spent a little energy finding other terrific, willing and excited resources to “do the work”. Just a little “woo hoo” for momentarily resisting the urge to do it all myself and intentionally leaning into my #1 CliftonStrengths strength (I’ll share mine if you share yours!).
2. To carry the message of the TRF (Thoroughbred Retirement Foundation) widely I was delighted to record my first 2 podcasts of 2021 (thank you Pete Fornatale, In the Money Podcast & Rick Thompson, Talk Saratoga), and to facilitate our first print media piece (anticipated in The Aiken Horse in last week of Feb).
3. To help my Padre navigate and execute a move to live nearer to me  I am proud of us for completing our 3rd “virtual tour” this past week, and moving along toward making a timeline for next steps & decisions. Very thankful to Renee Birnbaum for her assistance (and if anyone is undertaking a similar journey, please let me know – Renee is a great resource with a national network of colleagues)

That’s it for now. Be well and keep on growing!

Namaste,

XO

Hello Friends!

It’s a sunny, but frosty 23 degrees Sunday afternoon here in Saratoga. The fireplace is on, the neighborhood kids are playing outdoors (they raise ’em tough up here), and I can hear the first sounds of football on TV in our living room. All is well, safe and peaceful for us… but it’s been a week of signs in all their splendor and severity. Hopeful heights and heartbreaking lows, and much to learn from all of them.

As I wrapped up last week, I felt ready to dive in to an admittedly self-serving presentation of my goals for the year as the focus of the Maven and Magpie blog in 2021. My intention: to burn brightly. And then, the week happened.

Hope is in the air

First, the joy and exhilaration of Wednesday’s Inauguration. For all the anxiety I felt in the lead up, and even through the vows and formalities as our new leaders sat so exposed on the steps of the Capitol, the day was magnificent. It was wonderful to see the blue skies, the flags, and the splendor of DC showing its best and most beautiful to the nation and the world. I loved Gaga’s glorious gown and rousing rendition of our National Anthem, I loved J. Lo’s over-the-top Chanel couture and her “let’s get loud” medley of feel good songs about our country. While I was much less impressed with Garth Brooks, I was utterly mesmerized and captivated by the absolutely extraordinary Amanda Gorman. Wow. What a gift for all of us to participate in the historic moment of her national debut and to receive her words, as a mantra to carry us through these challenging times.

I’ve written her poem by hand in my journal to help me absorb all the beauty in her words and I’ve decided to listen to her performance once a day for 30 days, like a tonic for a weary soul. (It surely can’t hurt.) I’d love to have you join me!

loss and Grief

Then, the blows of reality began to land. Three lives lost in my world, in rapid succession – from different chapters of my story – and all with the same, painfully poignant lesson: Tomorrow is Promised to No One.

While my blog is not the place to share the stories of each beloved individual, I feel the best way to honor them is to cherish each as a messenger for all of us. I am humbly and sorrowfully grateful for their role in making me feel the terrible un-fillable hole of loss that is left when someone is taken unfairly (to our human eyes), suddenly and seemingly too soon. The three losses I’ve experienced this week have pierced the walls of my cozy little cocoon, with a tiny sample of the painful reality faced by everyone who loved each of the 400,000 souls lost, so far, to a virus we knew nothing about one year ago today.

Each of these friends represented the very best of a “life well lived”. Theirs were lives that serve as inspiration for all of us. They truly and completely lived, in vibrant color and at full volume, until the last. Two of them, my peers from high school and from college respectively, were dealt the miserable hand of cancer diagnoses which they fought valiantly, although far too briefly. Their courage was their final gift to those who knew and loved them. The third, much older in years, but not in spirit, energy, passion or will to live each day fully and on his own terms – not bending to the expectations of someone “his age” in any way. Cruelly, for those left behind, this individual was gone with no warning and no chance to say goodbye – a peaceful escape from this earthly world, and a terrible shock to those whose future included so many plans with him at their center.

So, what to do with all of this? I am inclined to add my mourning of their passing and my awe in the way they lived each day to the kindling of my fire to “burn brightly” this year. It seems that the best way to celebrate all they were and all they demonstrated is to do great things as they would have done, given more time, and to remember them in so doing.

“To whom much is given, much is expected.”

This is a quote that has always driven me. It wakes me up in the middle of the night, it drives me to jump out of bed and to do my best Hamilton rendition of “not throwing away my shot”. My three friends are adding their voices to the chorus.

if only we’re brave enough to be it

So, I turn back to my intention for 2021: to “burn brightly” and make my greatest impact. This simple intent seems even more important and urgent than it did last week. I’m not sure my specific goals are meaningful enough to truly honor my friends, but I’m hoping they are clear enough to give me a chance to make a difference.

By sharing them, I’m inviting you to join me on my journey – both by following along the path with me and by suggesting new paths or doorways that might help me reach them more directly. And, of course, I’m counting on you to hold me accountable when I drift (and I’m sure to drift).

magpie goals for 2021:

1. To help my Padre navigate and execute a move to live nearer to me and to realize all the benefits of living in a supportive, active and engaged community. Objective: settling him and his loved ones into a new home in upstate NY by end of 2021.

2. To carry the message of the TRF (Thoroughbred Retirement Foundation) widely through dramatically expanded visibility and media coverage by specifically seeking out national and international audiences to whom I can deliver this message (speaking opportunities).

3. To secure at least one major gift ($5K or greater) for the TRF from a donor compelled entirely by the human impact of the TRF Second Chances (with only distant interest in the welfare of the horses).

4. To maintain a disciplined & balanced approach to the allocation of my energy including my calling (the TRF), my health (mental & physical), my community (family, friends and Saratoga), and an ample dose of time given to “unscheduled/unstructured” fun & rest too. Objectives: Run a 5K this summer & blog once a week – gulp.

5. To meet and exceed my annual Major Gifts fundraising goal. Objective: To enjoy a December similar to 2020 without anxiety.

This week’s recommended resources are:

1. NY Times Podcast “1619“ – 6 parts, beautifully done, impactful & important.
2. The Hill We Climb – Amanda Gorman (daily)
3. “Dismantling QAnon” by TedX-MidAtlantic (Oct 2020)- challenging, shocking, eye-opening and scary. I’ve had my head in the sand about what this is for a long time, and this was super informative way to pull the wool away from my eyes.
4. A Promised Land, Barak Obama – finished this engaging, informative and refreshing book this week… and can’t wait for the next one!

Much to Celebrate

1. Lives well lived. May they Rest in Peace and their spirits inspire us Every Day.
2. A new US President, Vice President, Administration and countless public servants dedicating and re-dedicating their lives in service to their communities and their country. (Shout out to our awesome re-elected New York Assemblywoman Carrier Woerner)
3. The amazing volunteers who come together here in Saratoga to make the Rural Food Delivery Program happen. Wow! I may use my blog to capture the story of this incredible group. Over the past few months I’ve been observing them and documenting the system that keeps these trains running. Hats off to Saratoga LifeWorks (formerly EOC) and Presbyterian New England Congregationalist Church (PNECC) for all they do to make this happen.
4. January is Mentorship Month. I’m hoping to become a mentor this year (two pending opportunities to make a direct impact), and I will look forward to sharing that journey too. If you have time and interest, spend a minute to google “mentorship programs near me” and see what you find!

And, that’s it for now. Looking forward to “raising a glass” with friends and family on zoom tonight and hoping to manage my time in the most impactful way possible over the week ahead. Thanks for listening!

Namaste,

XO

January 2021

Good morning friends!

Well, here we are. Saratoga Springs, NY on January 18, 2021. Wow.

I just took a moment to look at the list of “published posts” on Maven and Magpie since that car-ride to the Hamptons 3+ years ago (71 of them). The first one written the Eve of our “Re-invention” (Dec 23, 2017). I know it’s painfully cliché, but I can’t help saying “So much has changed, and so much has stayed the same”. And for all of it, the changes and the sameness, I am just incredibly, profoundly grateful.

Some of you have been on this journey with us from the start and few may have just stumbled upon us along the way (and a handful of you were gently nudged to join by me). To each of you – thank you.

The concept of imagining an audience for my thoughts has been the inspiration for me to capture them in words. I find a murky mix of answers when I look down the rabbit hole of “why am I writing this?”. Truly, there have been different reasons at different seasons. Sometimes I’ve wanted to keep friends & family posted of our progress, sometimes I’ve needed a place to park the challenges and emotions of the journey, from time to time I’ve just wanted to capture a milestone, and most recently this summer, I wanted to share an experience that I found enriching, challenging and possibly somewhat interesting. Through it all, I’ve wanted to practice writing about something other than my work and I’ve nurtured the ember of hope that something in my musings might be helpful, comforting, encouraging or at the very least mildly entertaining for the reader – wherever you are, whoever you are, and whatever mountain you’re planning to climb.

So today, sitting here in our cozy home on Madison Street, just back from a mid-morning walk around “our loop” (it’s MLK Jr. Day, so I’m away from my desk), I thought I’d go read that first post. After launching from the car on Dec 23rd, my first “real post” was published on Christmas Eve from the Maven family’s lovely home in the Hamptons.

Here’s what I wrote about my “why”:

December 24, 2017

“And on to the blog, a couple simple goals I have in mind.

1. Share my observations along the journey of everyday life – kicking off with the big move Bobby & I will be making this year.
2. Share our adventures – largely along the Food & Travel lines, with a big dose of Thoroughbred Racing & Saratoga Lifestyle.  Somewhere in this goal lies the original inspiration for the Maven and the Magpie – Bobby’s maven-like talent for picking & finding great spots to eat, drink & enjoy and my Magpie-like desire to share our discoveries so they can enjoy them too!
3. Promote places, people, causes, products, services, events, activities and organizations I believe in and think are worth the time & money for others to check out. A curated set of things this Magpie wants to support by spreading the word.”

Time to Reset, Re-focus & Re-commit

While I may spend a few minutes ruminating on how well (and not well) I stuck to those goals, I’m mostly focused today on the “what next? where do we go from here?” as I look ahead to 2021. Taking stock of the miles we’ve traveled over the past 3 years, especially the strange & special year of 2020, one thing is incredibly clear: the Maven and I have arrived at our destination. We are very, very fortunate to be exactly where we want to be, doing what we are each called to do and to be in a community we are happy to call home. We’ve “come a long way, baby” – no doubt about it. As my friend Rebecca’s Boy Band navigation system loves to say in its funny, British accent singsong voice “You Have Arrived”.

So that means it’s time do what we came here to do – whatever that is!

The words that have emerged for my 2021 Intentions center around a craving to make the most of the gifts and blessings we’ve received, while we can. Carpe Diem!

For me, I think it’s time to make my highest and best impact on the world around me. IMPACT is the word I keep hearing in my head. It is accompanied by a strong sense of BURNING BRIGHTLY, deep like a true flame and not disparate like sparkles and fireworks. Within this there’s a mandate to choose things carefully, and then to lean in “full-tilt”, and perhaps find ways to measure progress – to know if my energy is being converted to meaningful effect. This is what I plan to focus on this year and I think this is what I’m going to write about too. Fair enough? How about you?

A CAVEAT: Let’s be clear. I’m not writing this as an advice column (although I fear it may come across like that from time to time). The one thing I know is just how much I don’t know, but I am going to lean on lessons learned along the journey so far – and we’ll see where those take me.

If you’re game to join me, I’d love the company!

With that in mind, here’s my updated plan for the blog 2021:

1. Set some goals (intentions, not resolutions) and share them publicly – then tell the story of my progress, so that you can help hold me accountable.
2. Identify resources that help me realize my vision– with hopes they serve someone reading too.
3. Celebrate milestones “wins” and examples of individuals and organizations who are inspiring to me – with hopes that they inspire you too!

Getting Started…

“The journey of a thousand miles, starts with one step”.. an oldie, but a goodie. And that’s what this post is – a start. I’ll be back soon to dig in and get rolling, but for now an appetizer:

1. Goal: Write one blog post per week. (Eek. I was going to say month, but I’m going to stretch.)
2. Resources: Reinventing Greatness by Shari Goodwin (and Lemon Squeezy) – I’ll share more on this over the days ahead for sure, but for now just go ahead and buy it, you’ll be glad you did! (And remember to always use AmazonSmile to be sure your favorite charity benefits from your purchase!)
3. Celebrate: Today this is easy – it’s a day designed to remember him and be inspired by him. Here are two links that helped me start my day with MLK Jr’s words in my ears.
   1. 22 Inspirational Quotes from MLK Jr
   2. “I have a dream” speech in its entirety (17 min)

Time to start blooming!

Namaste. Stay safe, well and hopeful!

XO

Kim